House hunting in Lagos is not for the faint-hearted. As an autistic person, I get overwhelmed by every sound, noise, and flickering light.
Jumping around on the bustling streets of Lagos, known for its relentless hustle and bustle, isn’t exactly my idea of fun. An app might help, but physically seeing a potential home matters, especially for someone like me. The environment can make all the difference for an autistic person.
I should’ve written my weekly story last Saturday, but I couldn’t because the stress had completely knocked me out. The headaches and exhaustion from two days ago are still lingering, and I find myself wondering — Why am I even putting myself through this? Why does this process have to be so hard?
The sensory battle of Lagos
For two days, I navigated the streets of Lagos, and it was pure sensory overload. Honking cars, crowded pavements, and street vendors shouting from every corner — it felt like the city was attacking me from all sides.
Bright lights from passing vehicles, the glaring sun, and the constant hum of life around me made it impossible to feel grounded. Lagos is always moving, and for someone like me, that vibrancy can quickly become suffocating.
I’ve dealt with stress-induced illnesses before. During my National Youth Service Corps (NYSC), the combination of early mornings, blazing sun, and constant activity led to my body shutting down after only five days.
I ended up in the clinic within the first three days, and the nurse told me outright that they couldn’t allow me to collapse from exhaustion on the fourth day. He then gave me an exit, instructing me to leave the camp immediately.
House hunting felt eerily similar. The two days of trekking from one location to another left me physically sick — headaches, mental fog, and near shutdown. Sensory triggers like these don’t just cause discomfort for autistic people; they heighten stress to the point where it becomes debilitating.
A home is supposed to be a sanctuary, but finding that in Lagos is tough. When you’re looking for peace from the chaos, the process itself shouldn’t make you sick. Yet, that’s exactly what it does.
The stress of social interaction and negotiation
House hunting in Lagos isn’t just about choosing a place; it involves negotiating with agents, dealing with landowners, and facing constant surprises. Finding a calm, quiet space is no easy feat, and when you do, it often comes at a steep price.
For example, one landlord asked me to leave simply because I’m a reporter. 😂 Why should my profession be an issue if you’re not involved in anything shady? If you’re Nigerian, you’re likely aware of the tribal biases among landowners.
The rent is quite exorbitant as well—why on earth should I pay 1 million naira for a self-contained room? That’s utterly outrageous! Yet, that’s the going rate in some areas, especially in quieter environments. Now, aside from hoping they don’t kick me out because of my job, I’m also anxious about coming up with that 1 million naira as soon as possible. Like where will I see that money now? Mind you, that’s just rent.
Besides, as an autistic person, dealing with social interactions can be draining. The constant phone calls, in-person meetings, and the pressure to negotiate wore me down quickly.
I remember explaining to one agent that I needed a quiet environment, and they looked at me like I was being overly picky. It wasn’t until they saw me struggle with the noise on the road, that they understood I wasn’t just being difficult — I was genuinely trying to find a space that wouldn’t overwhelm me.
Communicating my needs clearly, without being dismissed, has been a challenge. That’s why I brought a friend along to help with the process. They acted as a buffer, helping me inspect the room and explain my requirements. Limiting direct interactions by using texts or emails whenever possible also eased the stress a bit.
The emotional and physical toll
After a day of searching, the emotional and physical exhaustion hit me hard. Headaches, stress, and even meltdowns became part of the process. The emotional fatigue lingered long after the house visits were over. I found myself too drained to do the things I love, like writing last Saturday, and that’s when I realised how much the process was affecting my overall well-being.
There’s always this internal conflict — Why does this stress matter? Should I keep pushing myself when I feel this sick? The truth is, the stress does matter, because finding the right home is essential for my long-term well-being. A home is supposed to be a place where I can recharge and find peace, away from the sensory chaos of Lagos. The process is draining, but the end goal — a peaceful environment—is worth the discomfort.
The importance of environment for autistic people
For autistic people, the right environment is crucial. We need stability and predictability, and the wrong home can lead to frequent sensory overloads and anxiety. A quiet, calm space isn’t just a luxury — it’s a necessity for functioning and peace of mind.
Ideally, I’d love to find a place in a quiet neighbourhood, with good soundproofing and soft, steady lighting — nothing flickering or too harsh. Minimal foot traffic would be a dream, too. But the reality is, while apps and online platforms can streamline the process, nothing beats physically experiencing a space. I can’t rely on pictures alone to gauge whether a home will trigger my senses or not.
To manage this, I’ve found it helpful to do as much research online — communicating to my agent well, asking necessary questions — as possible before visiting a property. It cuts down on unnecessary trips. I also make sure to visit different neighbourhoods at various times of day to get a sense of how noisy or calm they are.
Coping strategies for sensory overload
Over just two days on the streets, I picked up a few strategies to cope with sensory overload during the house-hunting process. Noise-cancelling headphones are a lifesaver in crowded or noisy areas—they help me block out the chaos and stay focused.
Scheduling viewings during quieter times of the day can significantly reduce stress, and bringing along a trusted friend or family member can aid in decision-making and communication. Taking regular breaks between viewings allows someone on the autism spectrum to regroup mentally and physically, preventing the sensory overload from becoming too overwhelming.
While these strategies won’t eliminate the challenges entirely, they could have helped me manage the process without completely burning out had I followed them all.
House hunting as an autistic person in Lagos is undoubtedly exhausting, both mentally and physically. But it’s not just about finding a roof over your head — it’s about finding a space where you can truly thrive. The process is stressful, but in the end, the goal is to find a place that offers peace and comfort in a chaotic city.
To anyone else in a similar situation, it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. It’s okay to take breaks, pace yourself, and ask for help when you need it. The stress of house hunting is real, but so is the reward of finding a home that suits your needs.
Despite all the challenges, the effort is worth it. A home that provides sanctuary from the sensory overload of Lagos is not just a place to live — it’s a space where you can finally breathe. Keep going — you’ll find that place.